The Crossroads of Opinions & Advice

A Cup of Tea with Carol
Written By Carol McLeod

I have opinions, do you?

I have strong opinions … meaningful opinions … meaningless opinions … and gentle opinions.

I have opinions about food … about colors … about weather … about books … and about people.

I have opinions about politics … and about morals … and about raising children.

I have opinions about marriage … and about worship … and about the treatment of immigrants.

I have opinions.

However, I have come to realize that my opinion is not necessarily my advice.  If my opinion is birthed out of wisdom and my Christian faith … then it would indeed be my advice.

Other times my opinions are birthed out of individual preference, likes and dislikes and my particular perspective; it is in these situations that my opinions are NOT my advice.  They are simply … my opinions.

Have I lost you yet?! Let me explain …

I like blue better than green … but I don’t expect you to like the same color that I do.  Blue is my opinion not my advice.

I would rather read a book than go to the movies … but I don’t expect you to stop going to the movies just because I would rather glue my eyes and brain to a great read. Go to the movies! Have a blast! Enjoy every minute and eat some popcorn while you are at it!  Me?!  I’ll be at home with a cup of coffee, a warm blanket and a great book. It’s my opinion … not my advice.

I like warm weather better than cold but if you want to go snow skiing?!  “Break a leg!” (Not literally of course.) You will find me on a beach, in the sunshine with a book in my hand.

Then, there are the times when my opinion might seem to border on advice. However, I hope that I am an understanding enough human being to allow you your opinion concerning these murky issues.

Let me explain this juncture in our journey that began at opinion and is traveling toward advice ….

I believe it is important to hold a baby.  I don’t believe that you spoil a baby by being lavish and generous with physical touch.  I don’t believe that “love” spoils a baby.  I strongly believe in holding, rocking, singing and enjoying the baby years.  I believe that when you cuddle your little ones, you are actually building a bridge that stretches toward the older years.  I believe that the bond that is formed during the baby and toddler years will actually help a parent navigate the teen-age years with love and understanding.  However, your child is not my child.  God gave me my children and He gave you your children.  You will have to work out your parenting style with God and answer to Him for it.  No judgment on my part … but you will always just find me holding, rocking and singing to babies and little people.  Always.

I homeschooled my children for 23 years but I don’t expect you to follow my lead.  It is what Craig and I felt led to do and I would probably do it all over again! However, I know many Godly families who believe in sending their children to public school and are committed to it for the long haul.  That’s incredible! I also know wonderful parents who send their children to private school from the preschool years right through 12th grade. Wow … what a great commitment! However, I loved homeschooling … it was my opinion. The paramount issue is that every parent does what is right for his or her individual family.

Are you still with me? 

We are almost to the crossroads of opinion and advice!  And this, my friend, is where it gets interesting.

When my opinions are birthed in the wisdom of decades of living and from a Godly perspective, then perhaps it would behoove you to at least listen to my advice.

My opinion is that you will never be the person who you were created to be without developing a vibrant relationship with the Creator Who made you.  You are His masterpiece and He has an extraordinary plan for your life! That’s my opinion and my advice!

A strongly held opinion of mine that smacks of great advice for your life is to love everybody all the time.  Love people whose opinions are different than yours.  Develop a warm friendship with someone who voted differently than you did.  Show a caring and kind love toward those who get on your very last nerve.  Develop a friendly camaraderie with someone whose skin is a different color than yours is! It is, after all, what Jesus did and if I were you … I would try to agree with HIS opinions as much as possible!

Another well-thought out and life-changing opinion that I embrace is that joy truly is God’s will for your life.  You were created to be an ambassador of heaven’s miraculous joy while sucking in the atmosphere of planet earth.  If in His presence is fullness of joy … and if He lives inside of you … guess what your earthly body contains?!  You, dear one, are the perfect fit for heaven’s joy!  Depression, discouragement and despair will try to convince you that everyone else is able to participate in joy except you … but don’t let those old scoundrels gang up on you like that! If I can live in a place of joy after years of depression … so can you.  And I must say, I like joy a whole lot better than I do depression!

So … take it or leave it!  You don’t have to agree with my opinions to be my friend.  You don’t even have to take my advice if you choose not to do so.  But I can tell you this … when we choose to listen to the opinions of others with respect and honor the world will be a more loving and understanding place.

As always, thanks for listening to my heart. It’s not a perfect heart … but it is a heart that is enthusiastically chasing after God and all that He is!

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Carol McLeod
Carol says, “I am just a girl who is head over heels in love with Jesus ... passionately addicted to His Word ... and find all of the joy that I need in time spent in His presence." Carol is a Christmas-aholic, loves ACC basketball and the beach! Like all menopausal women, she is overly fond of chocolate and enjoys a good read. She doesn't like cleaning her house and is an expert in carry-out dinners. She hates to shop … loves to jog … and somehow finds time in her busy life to hang out with small children. She is the kind of woman that you could laugh with over lunch, cry with over disappointment and shout with over a victory! But … if you need her official bio … read on! Carol is an author and popular speaker at women's conferences and retreats, where she teaches the Word of God with great joy and enthusiasm. She also hosts highly successful Just Joy! outreaches. Carol encourages and empowers women with passionate and practical biblical messages mixed with her own special brand of hope and humor. Carol has written three books, "Holy Estrogen!", "The Rooms of a Woman's Heart" and "Defiant Joy!" which was released by a subsidiary of Thomas Nelson. Her teaching DVD, "The Rooms of a Woman's Heart", won the Telly Award, a prestigious industry award, for excellence in religious programming. Carol has also been featured on YouVersion (the smart phone Bible app) with several devotionals, including: "For the Journey Set Before Him", "Jolt of Joy", and "Joy to YOUR world", " Carol has a daily radio program, "Defiant Joy! Radio" which is available in several national markets including Youngsville PA, Warren PA, Buffalo NY, Roanoke VA, Norfolk VA, and Nashville TN.  A 1977 graduate of Oral Roberts University with a degree in Music and English, Carol has the distinction of being both the first Women's Chaplain and the first woman to speak at the university's Vespers.  Carol currently serves on the ORU Alumni Board as chaplain.  She is married to her college sweetheart and love of her life, Craig, who serves as senior pastor of Life Church, a church near Buffalo, NY.  Craig and Carol have been happily married for nearly 37 years and are the parents of five children and three delightful daughters-in-law. Craig and Carol are thrilled with the joy of being grandparents to five precious grandchildren! Carol has written three books, "Holy Estrogen!", "The Rooms of a Woman's Heart" and "Defiant Joy!" which was released by a subsidiary of Thomas Nelson. Her teaching DVD, "The Rooms of a Woman's Heart", won the Telly Award, a prestigious industry award, for excellence in religious programming. Carol has also been featured on YouVersion (the smart phone Bible app) with several devotionals, including: "For the Journey Set Before Him", "Jolt of Joy", and "Joy to YOUR world", " Carol has a daily radio program, "Defiant Joy! Radio" which is available in several national markets including Youngsville PA, Warren PA, Buffalo NY, Roanoke VA, Norfolk VA, and Nashville TN.  A 1977 graduate of Oral Roberts University with a degree in Music and English, Carol has the distinction of being both the first Women's Chaplain and the first woman to speak at the university's Vespers.  Carol currently serves on the ORU Alumni Board as chaplain.  She is married to her college sweetheart and love of her life, Craig, who serves as senior pastor of Life Church, a church near Buffalo, NY.  Craig and Carol have been happily married for nearly 37 years and are the parents of five children and three delightful daughters-in-law. Craig and Carol are thrilled with the joy of being grandparents to five precious grandchildren!
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